Today, we’re going to talk about five ways to “die to self” as worship guitarists, and the beautiful blessings that can result when we do.
My wife and I are blessed to have two amazing daughters. But with the privilege of having kids comes the need for sacrifice. In saying “yes” to having kids, we inevitably say “no” to some other things, at least for a season.
Can we both just head out on a road trip for a week? Not without making arrangements to have the kids looked after. Can we both work on ministry tasks straight through dinner and late into the night?
Well, with our family culture, we don’t usually do that, because we value the privilege of sharing a meal to debrief the day, and we also spend a few minutes with our kids at bedtime praying together.
These sorts of intentional sacrifices involve a certain amount of what could be called “dying to self.”
And because of our examples, our kids discover what that’s about as well as they wait for the fun activities while prioritizing academics and chores. We also eat nutritious food for our meals, and sometimes follow with dessert. We don’t typically eat dessert as a meal, right?
So much of what I’m about to share with you today boils down to refining and sharpening our characters. The symptom is how and when we play our guitars. The real issue is the flesh, whether we want to talk about it or not.
So, let’s courageously talk today about some ways we can intentionally “die to self” for the glory of God and the benefit of others, as well as the maturity of our souls as worship guitarists.
1. Delayed Gratification
Delayed gratification is a huge missing component of our culture in today’s world. We want fast food. We want overnight shipping. We want instant results.
Food that is cooked fast might taste decent, but it’s often less nutritious.
Overnight shipping has ruined us in some ways. I’m old enough to remember sending a check in the mail to order something, and reading the fine print on the order form that said “Please allow 6 to 8 weeks for delivery.”
If our Amazon Prime order were to take even a week to arrive, we’d probably get a little antsy and frustrated, right?
You’re probably sensing where I’m going when it comes to music and guitar. Many of us really want instant (or close to instant) results with the songs we want to play.
I had one student come to my teaching studio who had never played the guitar before. He said that the first song he wanted to learn was “Purple Haze” by Jimi Hendrix, and he wanted to learn it in its entirety during our first lesson.
I cautioned him and encouraged him to be a bit more realistic at the beginning…and after that conversation, I never saw him again.
Some guitarists want to learn songs or develop skills, but they don’t want it to take a lot of time. They long for shortcuts and hacks that reduce practice time to a fraction of what it might normally take.
And unfortunately, some guitar products or sales people promise all sorts of instant results in the short term. This might provide some momentum, but long-term, it’s been my experience that these students will lose momentum when the more intermediate music comes along…because it will take more effort and more time to get results.
Now, there’s something to be said for practicing smarter, with greater focus, and at an optimal time of day after having good rest and with good hydration. To that end, practice sessions can be shorter, and results can come more quickly.
But the reality is that quality practice will still take some amount of time. To expect to learn a significantly difficult guitar song in a matter of, say, 15 minutes total, is not a way to set ourselves up for being able to play the song well.
So, we can “die to self” as we flex our “delayed gratification” muscles and wait patiently as we practice diligently.
2. Hard Work
I remember cramming for tests in college. But it’s my conviction that effective practice cannot be crammed, for the very reason that we won’t have the songs under our fingers long-term, even if we can summon parts of them right away.
And complete songs are much more of value than fragments of songs. Have you ever heard someone start a song, and then trail off as the song just kind of falls apart? We all have.
So, as we wrap up this section, let’s remember that diligent, consistent practice is a way for us to “die to self.”
My father taught me the value of hard work throughout my entire childhood, and it has served me well, and also the people I’ve served and served with.
Many blessings, including good musical execution, are waiting on the other side of good old-fashioned hard work.
3. Setting Aside Personal Preferences
I have some very specific musical tastes. And believe it or not, as a worship leader, some of the songs I’ve led over the course of my career have not been my absolute favorites.
A person I served with on staff at a church was absolutely baffled to learn that I wouldn’t always choose songs that were personal favorites of mine.
But here’s why – and you may already know this. The songs aren’t just for my worship journey. There are many people in the congregation I'm ministering to who might have a deep appreciation for some of those songs that aren’t my personal preference.
The only hard line I need to draw is that the songs I lead must be Biblical. To lead songs that don’t reconcile with Scripture is to lead people astray. And so, I’m always vigilant about the message of the songs I sing (and even write.)
So, if a worship guitarist is on a team (whether in a leadership or support position), and a song they are playing on is not a personal favorite, can they “die to self” and still diligently prepare and lead that song well? That’s my hope as I share these words.
4. Being a Good Listener
In our membership in GuitarSuccess4U, I’m privileged to host multiple guest expert interviews with some of the most gifted musicians I’ve ever collaborated with.
And they offer some real pearls of wisdom in these interviews.
One expert, a multi-instrumentalist and producer named Brian Reding, stated that a musician who has less experience will often play more during a song.
In some ways, it’s a sign of insecurity or immaturity. To draw a parallel, it’s a lot like the person you might meet at a social gathering who mostly wants to talk about themselves and not really ask anyone else about their interests.
Imagine a less mature guitarist who has come to worship rehearsal. His or her mindset might be, “Well, I’m here. I’ve brought my guitar. I may as well play the whole time.”
But here’s the problem: there’s only so much sonic space in the musical texture, and the guitar is just one part of that texture, as are the other instruments and voices. If the guitarist is playing all the time, it could actually muddy the texture and make it hard for other instruments to artistically express themselves.
Brian’s wisdom about less experienced musicians wanting to play a lot is very telling. The flipside is that more experienced musicians will actually do something I love to observe: they will look for places not to play.
Now, that might seem counterintuitive, but following my analogy, if music is like a conversation, we would do well to exchange information. How do we do this? By listening.
I love watching a highly gifted musician play on a team for a song, especially for the first time.
They’re often waiting to start playing until they’ve listened a bit to what’s going on around them. Then they play, and perhaps they might momentarily tacet (which is a musical expression for not playing), before coming back in.
And when they do come back in, guess what? It means more. Picture a bass player or a drummer laying out for the penultimate chorus. When he or she rejoins the band for the final chorus, it can feel just right. And people who don’t understand music will still appreciate it.
I love the conversation of music, and I love collaborating with musical “conversationalists,” because they know when to “speak” and when to “listen.” And then the “conversation” is much more meaningful.
It’s very honoring when someone asks me about my world, rather than just constantly talking about theirs.
So, if you’re a musician, much as it may be tempting to play the whole time, consider this challenge: “Don’t just do something; sit there.”
So, we can “die to self” as musical collaborators as we look for places not to play, and listen well so as to contribute more gracefully to the musical conversation.
5. Putting on Love
This last action is inspired by Colossians 3:14. If we put on love, we’ll do all of these things well, and for the right reasons.
If we don’t, we’ll do these things with some resentment or bitterness. Any amount of annoyance that creeps into these actions will actually invalidate them before the Lord.
Imagine if I verbally expressed gratitude, but wasn’t grateful. Imagine if I stated that I wanted to serve, but served only with an agenda and frustration at having to do so.
If we put on love, we are submitting to the Lord and making intentional efforts to ensure that our motivations are pure. We “die to self” as we put on love in all these endeavors.
Wrap-Up: The Flesh Must Die
When you saw the title of this article, I wonder if it made you just a little bit curious. That was my intent.
It can be easy to maintain the status quo of what we’ve always done as worship guitarists, but sometimes we need a message to shake us up and grab our attention. That’s been the intent of this collection of thoughts.
Remember, the flesh wants what it wants, but without inviting the Lord to guide and strengthen us, it will try to get its way. So, our fleshly tendencies need to…die.
As we wrap up, I’ll re-cap the five ways we can die to self as worship guitarists:
1. Delayed Gratification
2. Hard Work
3. Setting Aside Personal Preferences
4. Being a Good Listener
5. Putting on Love
I hope at least one of these has given you pause, and challenged you to make some slight changes to your trajectory as a worship guitarist.
One more verse – “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.” (Galatians 2:20a).
If we truly acknowledge the meaning of this verse – that our sinful self has been put to death and that Christ lives in us, we can walk in His strength, for His glory, in all that we do…including through our musical offerings.
Let’s do that. And let’s watch what happens when we do.
Now, if you’re looking for more opportunities to be challenged and encouraged, I want to encourage you to check this out. Encouragement is a high value to me and to my members in GuitarSuccess4U. So much so, that the second lesson of every month is actually an “Encouragement Lesson.”
Add to this that our Zoom calls are opportunities for real-time encouragement as a community.
Interested? Want to learn more? Check out GuitarSuccess4U.com. This could be the game changer you’ve been waiting for. It certainly has been for many of the guitarists I’m serving in this one-of-a-kind community.
Thanks for experiencing Guitar Serious Fun. I hope this has inspired and challenged you. I also hope you’ll like and share this episode with someone. When you do, I encourage you to share it in a way that helps the recipient understand that you want them to be sharpened by it as you have been.
Keep having serious fun as you play your guitar, and I’ll see you next time.
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